059b2f2e0195e7e2b0d90a611a4b2df9 
ALK said:
Yeah, the commission wanted me to stay away from the sexy and hypnosis areas with the story, so its more about she gets the crap scared out of her, mummified and entombed, then through a dreamy state, gets convinced that her life was a lie and her new life as a guardian is the real her through hundreds of years of sleep and subliminal messaging.
Sounds neat.

My idea was Gardevoir and Cofagrigus being left at Daycare for breeding.

Get pulled in and bound and...well need I say more?
Mr.H said:
Figured I'd get something spooky done for the month, but instead of the obvious, mummies! Dawns fallen under the Cofagrigus' influence and shes eager to assist her new master to draw in new victims to become its puppets.
OH gosh do I love this Mr. H!!! *gives a big hug and kiss* @.@
Ooooh, this is fun. I love that kind of look on Dawn... hypnotic makeovers are always so cute! <3

ALK said:
Yeah, the commission wanted me to stay away from the sexy and hypnosis areas with the story, so its more about she gets the crap scared out of her, mummified and entombed, then through a dreamy state, gets convinced that her life was a lie and her new life as a guardian is the real her through hundreds of years of sleep and subliminal messaging.
Imasuky said:
Sounds neat.

My idea was Gardevoir and Cofagrigus being left at Daycare for breeding.

Get pulled in and bound and...well need I say more?
Both of you should write all the things. Just sayin'. :D
ALK said:
Yeah, the commission wanted me to stay away from the sexy and hypnosis areas with the story, so its more about she gets the crap scared out of her, mummified and entombed, then through a dreamy state, gets convinced that her life was a lie and her new life as a guardian is the real her through hundreds of years of sleep and subliminal messaging.
I need, need, need to read this when it's done.
Defcon7 said:
Another winner, H! Almost everything you do just presses all the right buttons for me... <3
Yes, everythings going according the plan...

pokemongirl said:
OH gosh do I love this Mr. H!!! *gives a big hug and kiss* @.@
Welcome~ Now don't you have some other girls to help enslave? :>c

Apple said:
Ooooh, this is fun. I love that kind of look on Dawn... hypnotic makeovers are always so cute! <3
Characters changing their look after getting hypno'd is also a big thing for me, clearly X3
Mr.H said:
Yes, everythings going according the plan...

Welcome~ Now don't you have some other girls to help enslave? :>c

Characters changing their look after getting hypno'd is also a big thing for me, clearly X3
You have great taste with that. It's part of why I like your stuff so much. The other part is that you just ave a very cute/sexy style.
59705b2731feeb66bfc36b4660a9aeaa 
Incidentally, the 4th season was just announced.
I wish i was that monster.
Argonis said:
I wish i was that monster.
I think we all do good sir
Just noticed the characters are in a different order on the bottom panel, as to line up with the top one.
F1e5dff582d5c24d27760e370ade97f2 
>Scheherazade
Ah, I see you're a man of culture as well
Great text, bad image :/
0c34080ebb6e7e8d128fdac68aa3f9ca 
as the saying goes ask and you shall receive
So JUMBO @.@...and yes want to squeeze EVERYTHING *drools*
BioYuGi said:
Bio's brand-name, body-boosting, bubbly-brain hypnosis app.

Or the Bio Hypno App for short.
how much is it?
YES! THOSE TITS ARE PERFECT!
LJUBLANA said:
how much is it?
Free to download on the App store.
BioYuGi said:
Free to download on the App store.
In-app purchases $0.99-$99.99
Deleted-preview 
Wow... that text is tiny...
what is this resolution. So much pixellization....
Even the bigger version is pixely
61157e8214d5fa5c5f5d977b3c131f60 
'Teaming up' done right xD
That's what... 6 of Crimmy in two days?

Absolutely bananas.
CorruptionPrincess said:
I-I'm there also too guys ;-;
I'm actually starting to feel bad that I'm stealing your (and Dale's) spotlight :/

Come on guys, show a little love for them both and not just me
StepfordCrimson said:
I'm actually starting to feel bad that I'm stealing your (and Dale's) spotlight :/

Come on guys, show a little love for them both and not just me
Jaclyn is a real cutey
StepfordCrimson said:
I'm actually starting to feel bad that I'm stealing your (and Dale's) spotlight :/

Come on guys, show a little love for them both and not just me
This is the price of fame crimson
Bea4d64c3106f09d8bd6efd07165eb0d 
pokemongirl said:
I need that app!
Same!
Sleepyhead97 said:
The pre upload tag area doesnt have auto complete so i'm assuming those who aren't familar with the tags on the site find it easier to tag after the upload with the help of the auto complete.
I've always done it the hard way; opening up a second tab and searching for if the tags I'm thinking of are real or not. xD
Is this Jem and the hollagrams?
Goddamn kids forgetting to tag the goddamn heels in these goddamn pics...
Goddamnit.
Can we all agree that this would probably have in app purchases
RedCollarBlackCollar said:
Goddamn kids forgetting to tag the goddamn heels in these goddamn pics...
Goddamnit.
Goddamn.
B41dc61b04e52078b4c832a27a4ebc8a 
StepfordCrimson said:
I'm pretty sure we ALL are :P
Remember when they complained about tracers butt
Wait whats this about a spiral?
pokemongirl said:
Butts @.@
This picture helps me to remember that I like butts/hips a lot more than tits.
A is for
Amelie
Ass
And yes mistress I will serve @.@
MindMasher said:
There's a spiral?
Exactly what I was thinking!
8182e2dfe07712df57b13e786193a3da 
ghost13 said:
I feel like this needs context... Or to know what insane comic book storyline it's parodying.
Seems to me that Ubergirl was hypnotized by the hypnotist, who believes that the Ubergirls of parallel universes are a threat to all the multiverse and therefore orders his new slave to go kill them all. However, unbeknownst to him, in at least one alternate universe, a parallel version of himself is ordering his own Ubergirl to do the same thing.
ghost13 said:
I feel like this needs context... Or to know what insane comic book storyline it's parodying.
The Jet Li movie "The One" would be a good starting point.
Ubergirl is part of the DeviantArt OC Superheroine community :) she's also known as the Maiden of Mindlessness and is often tranced by various villains
Like the super villain design on the right, but the original Uber girl will always be my favorite
Apple said:
Seems to me that Ubergirl was hypnotized by the hypnotist, who believes that the Ubergirls of parallel universes are a threat to all the multiverse and therefore orders his new slave to go kill them all. However, unbeknownst to him, in at least one alternate universe, a parallel version of himself is ordering his own Ubergirl to do the same thing.
There's also an alternate universe where he orders Ubergirl to protect the other alternate Ubergirls, if you wanna get theoretically scientific.
6de62d34c73a1fe1deab42fc004556b1 
You know, there are few things that trigger my inner grammar Nazi like incorrect "ed" conjugation. I can't explain it.

Drawed = Drew
Casted = Cast (Unless you're talking about fishing, and even then Cast is more correct.)
Also, Withdawn in this context should be Withdrew.

Aside from that, you really forgot to include spaces after periods and commas. The phrasing, especially in the first part, is pretty repetitive, and at times reads more like a list than a story. There's a delicate balancing to storytelling that takes a lot of practice to get right, but there are two key principles to keep in mind. First, that the story should "flow" from one event to the next. When you put "Protag did X. Protag did Y. Protag did Z." you're introducing a series of hard stops into the story, rather than each line building off of the previous ones and adding details to the story. Secondly, you have to be descriptive. You want your words to create the same image for the reader as the one you had in your head when you were writing them. You're doing okay there, but you could still be better. The middle of the story's a bit of an exposition dump, though. Whenever possible, try to find a way to convey things to the reader without interrupting one story to tell a different one, like when you stop to explain the sword's properties. This information can be revealed organically, through things directly revealed to the protagonist, and through descriptions that imply information - for example, you don't have to say that the sword carries the lady of the lake's spirit or what she does, if your showing her coming from the sword and doing it.

Last, but not least, proofread a little more. You switch back and forth between past tense and present tense throughout your story. This is distracting to the reader, and more glaringly noticeable than all the typos in the world.
DanGambino said:
You know, there are few things that trigger my inner grammar Nazi like incorrect "ed" conjugation. I can't explain it.

Drawed = Drew
Casted = Cast (Unless you're talking about fishing, and even then Cast is more correct.)
Also, Withdawn in this context should be Withdrew.

Aside from that, you really forgot to include spaces after periods and commas. The phrasing, especially in the first part, is pretty repetitive, and at times reads more like a list than a story. There's a delicate balancing to storytelling that takes a lot of practice to get right, but there are two key principles to keep in mind. First, that the story should "flow" from one event to the next. When you put "Protag did X. Protag did Y. Protag did Z." you're introducing a series of hard stops into the story, rather than each line building off of the previous ones and adding details to the story. Secondly, you have to be descriptive. You want your words to create the same image for the reader as the one you had in your head when you were writing them. You're doing okay there, but you could still be better. The middle of the story's a bit of an exposition dump, though. Whenever possible, try to find a way to convey things to the reader without interrupting one story to tell a different one, like when you stop to explain the sword's properties. This information can be revealed organically, through things directly revealed to the protagonist, and through descriptions that imply information - for example, you don't have to say that the sword carries the lady of the lake's spirit or what she does, if your showing her coming from the sword and doing it.

Last, but not least, proofread a little more. You switch back and forth between past tense and present tense throughout your story. This is distracting to the reader, and more glaringly noticeable than all the typos in the world.
Thanks for the advice,sorry my english is pretty bad and i know it.I will try and improve it!
Btw i actually don't usually add spaces after fullstops and commas, I will do that now thanks!
I think i understand what you are implying DanGambino, i agree the story would have been better if i had described the spirit before droping all those information on the reader.
Sao was good untill people stopped dieing in my opinion others 10/10 would watch again
For a first one, this is fairly good. I liked it personally, and I'd love to see more from you in the future.