Not to discourage you, but you didn't really write anything original. You took a scene from FSN, and wrote out what was implied but not spoken, and then altered the ending by excluding Shirou and Rin, and adding 4 sentences. This is basically what happens in one of the routes(and is almost exactly how one of the bad endings goes), bar the last 4 sentences.
Not to knock on your coloring scheme for your words, you did a great job on the text. Its just your story is almost exactly how the scene plays out so I wanted you to know that you should be more original in your story next time.
>> #151363
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>> #151441
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Not to knock on your coloring scheme for your words, you did a great job on the text. Its just your story is almost exactly how the scene plays out so I wanted you to know that you should be more original in your story next time.
>> #151497
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First ever post, and first creation hope you enjoy.
I love it!