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6 comments (0 hidden)

IDPet
>> #479717
Posted on 2022-08-23 16:29:00
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Corrupt a wish YCH:

Xiana wished a sister, but her "sister" wished a cat.
Jeffb
>> #479727
Posted on 2022-08-23 21:41:28
Score: 0 (vote Up)
It's a fun idea, but PLEASE work on your English. This is just painful to read.
IDPet
>> #479728
Posted on 2022-08-23 21:46:40
Score: 0 (vote Up)
@Jeffb

Hey, explain my mistakes would be nice. I can't improve if you don't explain it.
IDPet
>> #479735
Posted on 2022-08-23 22:49:34
Score: 0 (vote Up)
And reading again, maybe I sounded a bit rude, but that wasn't my intention xD. That was just a honest message, I want to know what I did wrong so I could keep in mind in the future, or even fix this picture.
Endy
>> #479884
Posted on 2022-08-25 15:47:43
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Regarding the writing mistakes:
> so her other personality o take on a physical form
That O is probably a typo, but "to" isn't gramatically correct here. "could" or "can" would be correct. You could also change the "so" to a "for", and then "to" works

> but Xiana wasn't interested in a sister, she wanted was to have a cat ,so she used her hypnosis skillson Xiana
besides the spacing mistakes, "she wanted was to have a cat" needs to either start with the word "what" or remove the word "was".

The other sentences have correct grammar, but the fact both characters have the same name make it very confusing to read.
IDPet
>> #479886
Posted on 2022-08-25 16:05:50
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Thanks for that, I can prepare a fixed version later.
About the names, The original girl is Xiana and the other one is Xania, it's similar, but that's ot the same name.
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