-Previous pages have been messily torn from the diary, however the entry continues-

...with me losing consciousness soon after. I never thought me going alone would have led to all of this.

What happened next, I will never forget. Where they took me was a theater I never knew existed beneath this academy! And as I struggled and protested, the freckled one who captured me, bound me up in a perverted straight-jacket, before strapping me into a ridiculously large, wooden chair. Cool metal pads pressed down onto my scalp as the teacher (Ms. Yukizome? Why her?) in the red apron and dress seemingly prepared me for... something. No matter how much I yelled or pleaded, it didn't seem to matter to them at all.

And then. It started.

At first I was... confused.

It was just a movie. Some sort of poor taste, horror film!

But then...As I noticed them...

Their faces... Their words...I realized what I was watching.

"No.." I whispered to myself.

I remember it was then, I began to feel really sick. But as much as I wanted to, I couldn't shut my eyes. And even when I tried to look away, I still couldn't get the picture from in front of my eyes!

I was trapped. Trembling as I witnessed the... Unimaginable terror unfolding before me. As if slowly, the ever changing images and scenes were being etched into my mind.

In-between it all, I heard her. Junko Enoshima's voice behind me. I'll never forget her words as they sounded so... authoritative and precise. "As you can see, class, the subliminals embedded within the frames of the picture have caused the subject to experience a death-like paralysis together with deep feelings of helplessness, terror and despair. The audio subsequently controls the subject's focus while the induced eye movement from the subtle changes in coloration manipulates her memory of the experience."

I wouldn't know what she was talking about until much later.

The Ultimate Despair then continued her long-winded explanation. "All resulting in robust activation of her amygdala, hippocampus, anterior cingulate cortex, insular cortex and primary visual cortex. One of our earlier test subjects described it as being like 'death', 'a sense of stifling and drowning', and it is during this period we have found the subject will make their most rewarding associations between this catastrophic experience, their environment and the hopeless violence that they see~!... Ahh... Now I made myself jealous.. Like, the kind of jealous that makes you want to slap the word "super" in front of it... Super-super-super-super jealous... No maybe more like..."

"STOP!! LET ME GO!! STOP IT!" I yelled, but all I heard in response was a mix of laughter, sighs and awes of excitement. "I'M GOING TO BE SICK!... I want to get up!!!! Stop the film... Please stop it...!!! I can't stand it anymore. Stop it please... PLEASE!!!"

"Whoa. Like how rude, Little-Miss-Piano-Freak! I was totally trying to monologue here!" Enoshima replied. "Although....Upupupu... It sounds like we're off to a beary promising start!!!! By my calculations, you'll be feeling fine, beary soon!!! Ms. Yukizome... Go help our student grin and bear it through the homestretch! We mustn't let our promising student fail when they're soooo close!"

"Hee hee! Roger-roger!!!"

It was then I felt Ms. Yukizome's hands around my chest. And I was... confused. While I could not see what she was doing as I stared, transfixed upon the cinematic perversion bombarding my eyes. I was aware of each twisted touch upon my chest... Each lewd caress my nipples... Each teasing lick upon the nape of my neck... All while I became oblivious to the number of times this unspeakable horror footage danced across my pupils.

I soon realized that with each looping of the movie, the horror and terror gradually subsided.

Skin-crawling appallment morphed into goosebumps of anticipation.

Stomach retching nausea, became breathless butterflies within my stomach.

My eye-twitching attempts to resist turned into a wide-eyed glassy stare.

Disgust gave way to anxiety. Which gave way to anticipation and arou-

.....

I suddenly jolted forward in the chair as I felt wetness between my legs. The wave of revulsion and horror now returning full force as I regained my senses and awareness.

"S-STOP IT!! STOP IT PLEASE!!! I BEG YOU!!!! IT'S WRONG!! IT'S WRONG! ALL WRONG!!! PLEASE!!" I cried, tears streaming down my face.

As I screamed out the words as loud as I could, I felt the teacher pause in her groping momentarily. "Aww, my dear Kaede...It's okay! I know you're feeling so horrible and wrong as you watch this. But we have to be hard on you. You have to be cured...You must..." She whispered in my ear, before nibbling the earlobe gently.

"But-! This is.. This is... Why is this... This feeling isn't right!! It's wrong!!!" I yell, my voice cracking as my breath becomes ragged and labored.

"Well, of course, it's wrong! Being good is a very horrible thing. That's what you're learning now. Your body is learning it..." She whispered again.

"I..I don't understand...! Why is being 'good' ba-" I gasped breathlessly, moaning in anguish and exhaustion. For hours I tried to resist. To endure as my mind, body, and spirit were assailed as I sat helplessly on that torture chair. Emotion and consciousness ebbed and flowed as I felt Chisa's fingers slide inside of me, plucking at my clit as she eroded what remained of my feeble will; I helplessly opened and closed my thighs repeatedly. My hips squirmed and turned back and forth, but no matter where I moved it was to no avail. My slit continued to tingle in anticipation.

To ache in arousal of what was happening to me.

Another moment of clarity emerged from the fog of sensory overload.

I had to stop this. I had to somehow get them to stop. I realized now what they wanted. It was all too clear.

"Oh yesss... Yes, Junko..." I yelled out breathlessly, sweat pouring down my face. "You've proved it to me... That all of this ultra-violence, mayhem and despair is... hopelessly erotic and right! I've learned my lesson, mistress! I completely understand...I see now what I've never seen before... I'm.. I'm cured!!!"

"Aww, how cute! She's lying to get free! Hehehehe...That's our resourceful protagonist, fighting to the very end~!" Tsumugi Shirogane said, giggling madly. "She's written so well!! Willing to lie in the face of despair to grasp hope in this twisted situation! Even cornered she tries to win and make it to the end!"

"I-I'm not lying!!" I spat out, drool sputtering from my lips. "Shut up!"

"Oops!!! EPIC FAIL! Whad'ya fuckin' know... Looks like you missed with your last lie-bullet!" Junko said, laughing wildly. "Upupupu! No, you're not cured yet, my little cinnamon roll. By my count, you've got a few more hours to go in your oven before you're nice and baked..." Junko Enoshima said.

"No, I can't! I CAN'T!!! I said I get it!! I GET IT!!!" I stuttered.

"Now, now. You really must leave it to us..." Chisa cooed softly above me. "Cheer up. In a less than.... Eight or so hours from now, you'll be free!"

I cried out and moaned in despair.

The moans I made in despair, the cries I made in despair, the breathless sighs of despair, all felt natural now. There was nothing else. No escape. No resistance. No hope of escape at all.

I lost. I was not going to make it much longer. I felt myself splitting apart while my skull felt ready to tear open to release the misery.

Then, it came.

It was like a headrush. The room shrank around the screen, and all I could focus on was the hellish ordeal being forced through my eyes.

Oh bliss, sheer bliss and heavenly pleasure! I sat there defeated, exhausted and aroused. My pupils dilated, lips curled in a rapacious smile, as I felt just how wet my pussy still was. My panties and the chair were now soaked, sweat mingled with my wetness. As I shifted in the chair to comfortably watch the video, an audible squish escaped from the seat of the chair. Ah, it was beauty and sensuality made flesh. And behind my eyes, it was almost as if I could feel the new thoughts and commands melting into my mind. By the time the movie flashed the hopeless end of the couple who were denied the chance to escape from the horror around them, my legs pressed together in desperation as I ached to for the chance to slide my fingers beneath the soft cotton fabric of my panties! The source of my arousal was now beyond just Chisa's groping and oral teasing, it was to the spectacle in front of me. It was thanks to the true wonder of wonders.

The wonders of pure, distilled despair.

The violence, the ferocity, the killing harmony of the student council stimulated the shattered remains of my libido and as Chisa's hand slid downward past the hem of my skirt and into my panties, I let out a raucous cry... Not out of fear, pain, or horror.

But from pure, unfettered desire. My slit was wet and waiting, and the first graze from Chisa's fingers sent electricity right up my spine.

I climaxed right as the final execution of the Killing Game had finished, and the victims screams had reached their crescendo. I slumped in my chair as my head fell forward. I sighed in exhaustion before giggling softly at my... depravity. In that moment, the last of my humanity had been extinguished! Snuffed like a candle in the winds of a storm.

There was really nothing strange about it at all. My total lust and desire for such sadistic, and perverse pleasure was completely normal, given the circumstance. After all, how would anyone NOT find this erotic after going through what I did? I had been brainwashed after all. The complete twisting and corruption of my mind was not my concern, after all. That's what I had learned. All that mattered, was the new yearning and desire I felt blossoming within me. As I stared in awe at the hundredth playback of the massacre, I marveled at my own helpless obedience. The message and commands now crystal clear to my new despairified awareness. The realization of my pitiful state made me even more turned on than I was before. Junko truly was a Master at this. The realization of the magnitude of her marvelous existence made the prospect of obeying her all the more arousing and satisfying. I sighed as I felt the relief and freedom of pure devotion and obedience. It was a new existence. A freer existence. An existence born from the execution of my mind and previous identity. The new me born from the ashes and debris of my sanity.

Reminiscing about the traumatic day the previous me was destroyed, always brings me such arousing and pleasurable despair.

I suppose that's why I felt the need to write this all out.

But.

I suppose leaving a record of my fate and how i really am would be pretty incriminating if someone else found it~! They'd know the truth of who I am and what happened to me....

Ahhh... Just thinking about such an outcome... My toes are curling in excitement! Maybe such an end would fill me with an even deeper despair... Hehe!

Somebody stop me, please!

If you can~

-K. Akamatsu

Dystopia69 said:
Oh God.

That's. Twisted as hell.

I love it.