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- Id: 68611
-
Posted: 2018-08-26 03:25:06
by TobiKohai - Size: 1800x1280
- Source: rule34.paheal.net:81/post...44#search=ahri%20ricegnat
- Rating: Explicit
- Score: 154 (vote up)
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>> #277705
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Want to see more of my stuff, released early and with all other sort of content? Check out my Tumblr!
meltingmindsshiftingbodies.tumblr.com/
>> #277748
Score: 0 (vote Up)
>> #277755
Score: 1 (vote Up)
I'm just gonna say the writing on this isn't super good. It's really generically bad "Men can't write women"
I'm sorry if it doesn't meet your standards, and I'm always looking to improve. Do you think you could give any hints about where exactly it really fell off for you or where to improve on? Kinda hard to know where to focus when I'm just told its all generically bad!
>> #277854
Score: 1 (vote Up)
>> #277864
Score: 0 (vote Up)
I'm sorry if it doesn't meet your standards, and I'm always looking to improve. Do you think you could give any hints about where exactly it really fell off for you or where to improve on? Kinda hard to know where to focus when I'm just told its all generically bad!
It's written like someone who has a vague idea of what sexy means, and what words are considered sexy, but who just mashed them together, while also trying to sound sophisticated. "Puffy sex" just sounds...uncomfortable for example
>> #277878
Score: 0 (vote Up)
It's written like someone who has a vague idea of what sexy means, and what words are considered sexy, but who just mashed them together, while also trying to sound sophisticated. "Puffy sex" just sounds...uncomfortable for example
Mhmm! Ok then, I'll try and focus more on those aspects. I'll admit in this one perhaps I focused a bit too much on the story rather than too heavily on the sexy, smutty parts of it, which means that they may have been rushed and like you said, give an idea of "I think I'm being sexy" rather than actually being sexy. Thanks for the advice! I'll try and improve on that for next time and pick my words better ^^
>> #277923
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>> #278066
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>> #401738
Score: 1 (vote Up)
I'm just gonna say the writing on this isn't super good. It's really generically bad "Men can't write women"
Wow. That's sexism, folks. We frown upon that. Why is everyone against us (men) now?