Hey everyone. I wanted to make this post as an apology. I noticed a chat log in the discord server with several people discussing the shitty things I've done... I have taken too many commissions. I have too many people I'm trying to juggle at once. Art has become an actual nightmare for me now, and people don't even like it to begin with, the community has made that loud and clear. If I owe you guys anything...please let me know and I'll refund you... I am so sorry for fucking up this badly. Screwing anyone over was NEVER my intent. I wanted to deliver quality art, but came up with nothing...

Sounds like you bit off more than you could chew. If you need to take a hiatus, I'm sure the majority of us will understand. Lord knows I'd need a break if I hit a stumble like that.

Says you on that last part, if you didn't "deliver" quality art, then I would've never commissioned you in the first place. You deliver very solid art and even impress me with what you can do. I just think you're in a position where you bit off a little more than you could chew...but don't get disheartened, man. People are still rooting for you and I'll be one of them!

This is a straight up case of some anvils needing to be dropped because in the end people would be unhappy regardless. I think multiple people feel bad about what has happened as well. But I'm hoping you can improve with what's happened as well and everyone can make up.

I wasn't part of the Discord server, so I can't attest anything concerning your behavior. However, as DaHypnoman says, your art is great regardless, and you have my support. I've had and seen nothing but positive interactions with you, and I don't really mind or expect anything concerning my own commission. Take whatever time you need.

Pen, I know that we haven't had the best of interactions in the past, but here is my honest advice for you, and this comes from the best place possible: stop feeling sorry for yourself. Stop listening to the people you've surrounded yourself with, that keep coddling you and telling you that you can do whatever you want, whenever you want, at whatever pace you want. As long as you keep putting this off, this situation will only get worse. I don't know anything about this Discord discussion, nor can I speak for the people involved, but if I had to guess, they don't want a refund- they just want you to deliver what was promised to them. The best, most honest thing you can do for these people that have given you their money, to help you out with whatever tight spot you were in, is to buckle down and just do it. Scour through every discord message and DA note to gather them all up, if you have to. You owe it to them- just because of the simple fact that they've paid you already in good faith. Finishing the commissions (hell, just getting a good chunk of them done) would take a huge weight off of your shoulders and it would help restore these peoples' opinions of you. Besides, if something else comes up where you need to ask for money again (no offense intended, but this seems to happen to you a good bit) you can take those commissions without having to worry about what you already owe to people.

I believe in you to make it right, man. I know a little bit about how... scary, I guess... it can be to know you messed up like that. I always try to remind myself that the sun rises every day regardless. I don't know your circumstances, so I won't try to advise you or tell you how you should feel... I just thought it might be helpful to know there's at least one more person out there who believes in you to make it right.

Pajamas, there is a difference between coddling and being supportive. Just as there is a difference between blunt honesty and being a jerk.

Seriously, he's here, apologizing because he heard that some people are upset about his work pace, He admitted to taking more commissions than he could handle, he's offering refunds to anyone who wants them, and then you're like "Stop feeling sorry for yourself!" Seriously, dude?

I really do not appreciate that kind of hostility towards any artist. And that is what it is, it's not "the blunt honest truth" it's not "Tough love" it's being a jackass, and kicking a guy you admit you don't like while he's down. Cut it out.



To Penken: Hang in there. Mistakes happen, and people can overestimate the workload they can handle sometimes. The best thing is just to do your best. This situation is rough, but you can learn from it and be more familiar with your work pace in the future. You are not a bad person just because you made a mistake in judging how much work you can handle.

Penken you do great art. Also as i am not part of discord i cant say what thing were said on there but i like your art and you have been really nice to talk to when we chated. Remember you have friends here who care about you.

The "coddling" I'm referring to is the people that are encouraging him to take his time, to take a hiatus, etc. people that mean well, but are not helping either him nor the people he owes. Being supportive, giving him ways to improve the situation and get things done, that's what he needs right now.



www.deviantart.com/penken...ig-callout-post-671289910
www.deviantart.com/penkenarts/journal/Who-do-I-owe-774382107

Penken keeps putting himself in this situation. Not me. Coming forward, saying that you've messed up, and apologizing is a good first step, but it's the going forward and correcting your mistake that's the journey, the most important part. What he needs to do now is to take action.



Look at the inverse situation: if I went around and commissioned 100+ artists, kept them waiting for payment for over a year, then came out and apologized, what do you think the community reaction would be? Somehow I think it would be more along the lines of a lynch mob, rather than having people show up and comfort me to tell me that it'll be okay, and I just simply bit off more than I can chew. That would be nice and all, but it still wouldn't change the fact that I owe 100+ artists for their hard work, and I would need to go out and pay them. He does not deserve special treatment just because he's an artist- when you promise something, you need to do the right thing and deliver it. That applies to everyone.

Also, don't put words in my mouth. Nothing I've said is even remotely hostile, and I did not "admit I don't like him". I said that we didn't have the best of interactions in the past- but I'm getting the sense that you read a couple of lines, wrote me off as an ass, and rushed to defend Pen. There was even a time where I very much wanted to be friends with him, I tried playing Overwatch with him, tried to interact best as I could- because I liked his art, and we both shared a mutual friend that I considered very close to me- but it just didn't click, which I'm not blaming on him, don't misunderstand me. However, I digress. I would so much prefer that he picked himself up and did better, but he needs to put his foot down and *do it*. He needs people to encourage him into action, and to support him the whole distance. It is the only way out of this situation and to make himself feel better about it.

I don't really want to jump into something that seems likely to devolve into some sort of flame war, but I guess I'll do it anyway because I feel that what I said is included in the statements made by those you denounce as "coddling" Penken.
I see where you're coming from with this, and to an extent I might even agree, but (and I say this as a commissioner) it is not my role to give anyone a lesson. Penken "needs" whatever he needs, but I certainly feel like giving him lessons on whatever he needs to do is one of the last things that he actually does need. All I can say is that, as a fellow lurker on what is in essence a community of perverts, I can only offer a little bit of written support, and not some sort of psychoanalysis.
As to the second point you made (again, this is coming from an actual commissioner), it's kind of a false equivalence to compare commissioners to artists, and it's certainly not the same kind of fault to fail to pay, as a commissioner, for a piece of finished art, as compared to an artist who needs to draw the piece and sometimes fails to do it in time (or, even, at all). The main difference being the amount of work involved, of course, but also the fact that (and this has been discussed a few times here), when you commission an artist, the art doesn't actually belong to you. A commission is little more than a glorified patronage, where you pay an artist to do a piece art he/she could do for free. Now there is some kind of implicit contract here, probably (in legal terms, although that would be above my knowledge) ; that said, if the artist refunds any money you've given, I would say that is way more than enough ground to nullify anything the artist owes you - badgering them to finish a piece afterwards is way beyond what's appropriate or acceptable.

And, at the end of the day, this is the Internet : if you're paying strangers for something, you have to expect it won't always go according to plan. To me, that's fine.

It's not a 1:1 comparison, true, but the point still is that when you promise something, you need to deliver it to the best of your ability. No matter who you are.



A commission is one person paying another for a product. If someone pays you out of the good of their hearts for a commission, that's perfectly fine, but they still paid for your work. It is not a "maybe" or a "if I feel like it" it is "You've taken my money in exchange for work." If people want to take a refund, that's between them and Pen- and fine. I have not said a thing about him doing the art anyway if someone takes a commission. Again, I wish people would stop putting words into my mouth.



There's something "not going according to plan" and then there's letting a problem grow and grow without addressing it. And besides, things "not going according to plan" is not an excuse for someone not to deliver on what they owe- or to refund them, if they accept it. It might be fine *to you* to not be given what you're owed, but that doesn't mean everyone else has to accept that.

I know what I'm saying might come off as harsh, but this is all in Pen's best interests. I didn't come here to start trouble, and I didn't come to argue with people that want to take offense on Pen's behalf. Taking a hiatus or making excuses will not fix this. The best thing he can do is to make a plan to get this dealt with, sit down, and start on making these.

I don't want to take offense on Penken's behalf, but again, you're really in no position to say that's "the best thing he can do".

What other options are there? Put it off even further, don't bother doing it at all? Do you think those would be better for him?

But the point is, what do you know "what's better for him"? Why should he follow your advice, as opposed to doing what he thinks is best? No offense, but you're a random person on the Internet. This next example is a tad extreme (but the basic idea still applies): if you told him jumping out a window was the best thing to do for him, would that mean he needed to follow it?
The point of all this is, this thread is not about what's best for Penken, or what Penken should do, or whatever. Sure, you can give him any advice you want, but there's no justification for him to follow it, and making it sound like you know what's best for him is (again, no offense) unbelievably arrogant.

The point of the thread is Penken apologizing and offering a refund. Your "advice", while possibly welcomed (Penken'd have to say what he thinks to know for sure), from an outside look, comes off as nothing more than condescending demands.