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- ? bellchan (manipper) 55
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- ? black hair 30849
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>> #141013
Score: 1 (vote Up)
>> #141014
Score: 1 (vote Up)
...
The fuck? Your prose is a bit to purple there.
>> #141015
Score: 0 (vote Up)
"The british voiced woman"
...
The fuck? Your prose is a bit to purple there.
Eh, pobody's nerfect. I tried writing Bayonetta during the prose and it looked ridiculous to my eye so went for the purple. Honestly I wanted to just post it with the visual change (magic aura) but was worried it'd get flagged for not being obvious MC so just bullshitted the text to make sure it would survive.
>> #141033
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Eh, pobody's nerfect. I tried writing Bayonetta during the prose and it looked ridiculous to my eye so went for the purple. Honestly I wanted to just post it with the visual change (magic aura) but was worried it'd get flagged for not being obvious MC so just bullshitted the text to make sure it would survive.
I would have put "The seductive tone of the English woman mused." Or something like that : P still very good over all.
>> #141051
Score: 0 (vote Up)
I would have put "The seductive tone of the English woman mused." Or something like that : P still very good over all.
Still WAY to purple to sound natural.
>> #141052
Score: 0 (vote Up)
"The british voiced woman"
...
The fuck? Your prose is a bit to purple there.
I've noticed in a lot of comments you make that you're a bit too abrasive.
>> #141053
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Still WAY to purple to sound natural.
No worries. I doubt I'll try writing again any time soon, but if I do I'll keep that in mind.
I think the only other time I attempted a story someone took the image and rewrote it to fix my errors, so if anyone feels inclined again then go for it. I'll probably only post images once in a blue moon and will refrain from writing ever again.
>> #141088
Score: 0 (vote Up)
>> #141278
Score: 0 (vote Up)
The idea of the hypnotic hair is great. And is that your work on the glow? Because that looks pretty nice as well.
But, yeah, as for the caption, practice your writing a little bit more, and it'll work out.
>> #206704
Score: 0 (vote Up)