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5 comments (0 hidden)

Blastman
>> #324011
Posted on 2019-06-24 20:09:44
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This is strangely adorable and I love it~
Mugen
>> #324026
Posted on 2019-06-24 22:02:10
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I love this...
but I feel it would fit even better to phrase part of this similar to; 'my gaze wraps around your mind'...

'so will you' - fits better with 'going'...
mtg710
>> #324050
Posted on 2019-06-25 04:05:31
Score: 0 (vote Up)
A little nitpick, but: "Admitted" is said so many times, maybe it would read better if another word was swapped in occasionally, like "confessed, "divulged," or "revealed." Or even just "told" or "said" to give the other instances of "admitted" some contrast.
pokemongirl
>> #324056
Posted on 2019-06-25 04:54:06
Score: 0 (vote Up)
Ummmmmm ya gonna need to look though AVSD's backlog tonight *drools* @.@
Gunlovers
>> #324120
Posted on 2019-06-25 11:39:12
Score: 0 (vote Up)
I appreciate all the feedback everyone, hopefully this isn't too horrible. For clarity, my mindflayer cap isn't mine. Just found that one. But I'm willing to shit stuff out.
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